I am writing about this particular pet peeve in honor of my mother, who recently had a very disastrous movie going experience. Bad movie, you wonder? Tragic story? No chemistry between the lead characters? No, my friends, bad snackers.
Nearly every movie theatre is guaranteed to have a row's worth of the chompers, the crunchers, the rustlers, and/or the slurpers.
I should establish, first off, that I am not at all opposed to snacks at the movies. They are horribly over priced, which makes you feel that they taste even better than they actually do (a similar effect can be seen in certain high end restaurants); the lights are out, so no one will know that you just consumed a bucket of 1300 calories; and they add a certain je ne sais quoi to the whole theatre going experience. That being said, let's get back to the pet peeve.
The fact that there is no table at the movies does not mean that you can disregard any and all semblance of table manners. Many of the same rules apply: don't chew with your mouth open, leave your breathing at a respectable level, and do not shake or pulverise any food items. If you buy a bag of twizzlers and you are incapable of removing them stealthy, without creating a piercing contortion of the plastic bag, remove a few before the movie begins and enjoy those unwrapped, quiet little nuggets during the show. I have been forced to blacklist an associate from movie going simply because of the candy bag crunch. When you have to rent the movie you saw immediately when it comes out on DVD to see what you missed, you know that you have to eliminate the perpetrator from your movie Rolodex.