Eye-Level Waiter

I appreciate a good waiter, consider myself an appropriately generous tipper, and have known many a waitstaff member in my day.  That being said, there is a certain waiter type that is capable of making me loose my appetite, no matter what the restaurant is serving.  This is eye-level guy.  He can't just stand at your table to interact with you.  He's not going for that type of business interaction.  No, this is personal.  Very personal.  So he is compelled to get on eye level with you at any cost.  Even if that cost is his own dignity or breaking clear through the barrier of your comfort zone.
He might squat.  He does actually sit at the table on occasion (just one of the guys).  Or, perhaps he will grab a nearby chair, swing it around, and sit in the straddle position while he gets to know you and your order.  God forbid.
He might not even remember that he's at work.  That's how comfortable he is.  Just hanging.  He may tell you a bit about himself or how the night prior went for him.  His very persona is what is on special tonight and he knows that you want the endless buffet. 
Heads up to the waiters of the world - I might be there for pleasure, but it's not with you.  Go ahead and look down on me from the standing position.  I'd like to keep this relationship purely professional.